Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
