that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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