no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just googled if crying burns calories
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
