where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize