I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize