My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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