I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I need moral support for this bender
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
