oh god the rape fog is back!
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize