Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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