so that wasnt chicken after all
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
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