: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
