we're blogging at a bar
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
