So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
