Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
