i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I think people are normalizing furries
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize