dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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