stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
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