I smell stomach acid.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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