8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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