his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
