They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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