sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize