Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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