i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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