Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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