so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
