Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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