so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
