Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
So vagazzling was a success
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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