You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Randomize
