just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
