No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
i think i just lost a toe
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