How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
