I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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