i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize