How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
