i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
