This girl is more easily done than said...
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
