i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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