I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize