I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
