she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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