Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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