i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Randomize
