He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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