HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
