She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
