all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
