Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
How's work?
Spinning.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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