how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
